murky mentality

My sublime subconscious, tell me,

where will you take me today?

Shall we once again explore the moors

of despair you seem to be so infatuated with,

where it’s as deep and dark as the eyes that first showed me there?

Or might we prefer a trip

to the vast plains of hopes never given up,

dreams yet to live

and loves still to lose,

where the air is fresh with blissful naïvety?

And if you’re feeling remorsefully playful,

would you indulge me

for a split second that lasts an eternity

in what I most crave –

I promise I’ll behave!

I long for just one night

without having to bear the sight

of what lies deep within this mind of mine

I somehow haven’t yet been able to tame.

No more hidden meanings,

waking up screaming,

not realising I’m dreaming.

Just give me a minute to myself,

hell, even a second would suffice,

to actually make sense

of this seemingly dense

dualism between what you think I want

and what I actually desire.